2025.030

I eat Special K with berries & whole milk as a midday snack & the sugar gives me a stomach ache. In Korea, Special K is an entirely different kind of cereal & is marketed as a weight-loss meal substitute. I remember as a not-quite-skinny 12 y/o following the piece-of-shit instructions on the box like it was scripture– TWO BOWLS A DAY TO REPLACE BREAKFAST & LUNCH, EAT A HEALTHY SALAD FOR DINNER–except I didn't eat dinner. If we(society) were more embarrassed about our obsession with young girls' bodies than girls eating & blowing up school toilets I'd have had a much easier time growing into the kind of woman who eats cereal at 4 PM & shits for a long time in an art gallery bathroom

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I search for a bedside table for A's new apartment but this man is receptive yet aesthetically ambiguous & hard to please so I feel a little testy. I go on Wayfair's nightstand category & list products price high to low because I cannot gauge his taste otherwise. But after seeing the most hideous 25k-a-pop nightstand I quickly switch the setting & scroll until my eyes feel so blinded by all the déclassé furniture. Why do humans need so much shit in the house to live. I can talk about why a small dot in the corner of a painting ruins the whole picture but cannot articulate why a certain coffee table looks gauche or a carpet looks nuts. It drives me insane that I cannot clearly explain why something is good or bad. I wish anyone would just believe me when I say it looks awful. How does one achieve such magisterial status